*looks sheepish*

Okay, I officially suck as a blogger.

That being said, I'm not quite ready to give up on it just yet. (*listens for applause and encouragement*) Is anybody left out there, by the way?

Anyways, my main excuse is that life became difficult, kind of killing my desire to write about it for the world to see, and then it got busy when I went into final year. Pity, because many interesting and amusing things have happened, and in typical 'me' style I can't remember a thing. Major downside to living in the moment. Now that things are all sunshine and roses again (literally, actually :P) here I am again...whether I will stay here remains to be seen, due to a regrettably short attention span, but I shall do my best...maybe it can be my one single solitary New Year's Resolution.

Considering the fact that the main purpose I had turned this blog to was keeping my friends and family informed of my exploits when I wandered over to the UK to study design thingies, I've said remarkably little about said exploits. This is partly because there have been none...or shall we say very few. For some reason, I am boring and antisocial in the UK. This might be partly attributed to the weather, which often dictates that you must stay indoors, and partly to having to get around by public transport in an unfamiliar city, which means it doesn't happen unless I have somewhere very specific to go. Also the fact that there seem to be very few 'kindred spirits' around, to quote Anne of Green Gables... :-/

Anyways, as far as design thingies go, after dabbling in many things I've finally found the niche I want to fit myself into, which = publishing, or editorial design as we say. Typography for publishing gives me joy. This actually fits in quite nicely with my previous education, which is a BA in English (Literature and associated subjects). And considering that I'm also a writer and an editor, it's awesome to be learning about the design aspect of the field. It's easy for me to find things I like, but hard for me to find things I absolutely love and have no doubt about, so I'm really really relieved I managed to find where I fit in right before final year began :D

Oh, this might also be a good time to make a little announcement. As of the end of June/beginning of July, I move back to Madras (for at least six months). Considering the fact that I don't work at Primark anymore (long story unworthy of being blogged about) I would just be hanging about in the UK trying to find some other similar job, since I wouldn't be able to get a design job till December when I would get (or not get) my work visa. I would also in the process miss 3 very important weddings AND Christmas for the fourth time in a row. No. I refuse. It shall not be so. I shall go home, and be productive, and spend time with family and friends, and make a portfolio, and then if God decrees it so, I shall meander across whichever ocean it may be to whatever country he takes me to, and make there for myself a nest, and spend the rest of my life happily weaving books (and possibly hatching eggs :-/)

Speaking of hatching eggs (aka sitting around joblessly) that is the one thing I am trying to avoid this year. Whatever my natural instincts may be, I am loading myself up with little projects and doing my best to be productive. The way I see it, final year is my last chance to make design thingies while guided by my awesome tutor, and time is, as they say, of the essence right now. So no more sitting around in bed watching TV shows until July (except yesterday, yesterday doesn't count) for this Cheeta.

So yes, the above stuff pretty much paraphrases what I am up to right now. Future posts shall be more specific. Provided they occur, which they will. *ahem*

Kthxbai :D

Random

In my last post, I spoke about emerging, and then disappeared quietly into the undergrowth once again. Having lurked therein for another two months or so, I have once again emerged to update my affectionate (and probably dwindling) readership on why I did so.

You see, I had a submission. The final submission of my second year. And then I was required to give a lot of thought to what I plan to do next year, and as most of you probably know, thinking too far ahead, for me, is an exercise in confusion. All I know for sure about the future is where I will be married (because, like most girls from St. Andrew's Kirk, I refuse to get married anywhere else) and that I will not live in a joint family (because, if I'm going to live with anyone's parents, I'd choose to live with my own rather than abandoning them and going off to someone else's). Also, I know that I will have more than two children, because my mother demands it, and I know that they will be thoroughly spoilt by their grandmother and look upon their mother as some sort of gremlin (because the probability scale is heavily tilted in that direction).

Sorry, what was I saying?

Oh well.

In other news, the weather in the United Kingdom continues to surprise and entertain us. In India, one would talk about the weather when there is literally nothing else to talk about and conversation needs to be made. And the conversation would go like this: "God, it's hot today." ... "Hmmm." ... *silence takes over again*. Whereas in the UK, the weather becomes a seperate entity entirely, or an 'anthropomorphic personification' as Terry Pratchett would say. In other places, people blame things on God and the Devil. In the UK, you can blame things on God, the Devil, or the Weather. And I'm sure people address the Weather far more often than they do the other two. "Please, please oh please don't rain today" ... "Thank you Sun for shining!" ... "Weather, please be good on the 5th of May because I'm planning an outdoor party two months in advance" (yes, people actually do that, in a country where it rains all the time...hope does indeed spring eternal in the human breast, doesn't it?!)

Anyway, the Weather has been unexpectedly benevolent lately, although it still can't resist teasing us with a week of cold rain after a week of gorgeous hot sunshine. We at 42 (my house number, in case I haven't mentioned it) have invested in a barbecue, and spent two lovely days in the backyard with it. At this point it occurs to me that I haven't talked about my housemates on here at all. This is surprising, because they are the most hilarious bunch of people you could ever wish for. I don't like mentioning people by name on here, so I shall call them...hmm...Dodo, Diki, Aanya and Ajit. I'm Cheeta. As you all know already. Although over here, it has become 'Chennai Cheeta'. Or 'Crazy Chennai Cheeta'. Or recently, 'CC'. Which has now evolved into a verb and taken on a life of its own thanks to Diki, who did I mention has two stylish horns and a long tail with a fork on the end of it? (Useful while barbecuing). We also have two regular visitors, one of which is Grumpy (not a dwarf) from the next house, 55, and Chittu Kuruvi, a tiny little thing whose volume settings are disproportionate to her size.

I suppose you've by now gathered that life is so entertaining that I forget to blog :D Also, there's so much to say that I end up saying nothing at all!

Anyway. Our first barbecue involved a LOT of food (which was consumed at an alarming rate), a punching bag (and a lot of hilarious boxing videos), a lot of impromptu visitors, a random tea party, a game of cricket, and Dodo, Chittu and Grumpy trying to fly away on a broomstick (and the neighbour's rake, which was stolen through the hedge). The second barbecue was in honour of Anu, Aanya's adorable cousin, and involved a LOT of food, some music which Aanya called 'rap with a c', an impromptu visit from our tutor and his son (who had called to invite us to their barbecue while ours was going on), and a bhangra session which took place on one side of the backyard while a serious discussion on design took place on the other. Typical 42 style.

Anyway, that's probably enough updating for now. Off I go for my morning cup of tea.

*emerges*

So (why do I start the majority of my posts with 'so'?), having promised the universe in general, like it cares, and my mother, who does care, that I would update my blog in a somewhat regular manner, I have failed to deliver. This displeases me. :-(

As this is around the time of year I normally make my New Year's resolutions, and since my Professional Practice course advises networking and blogging falls under that category, and because I want my mommy to be happy, I will be updating this blog more regularly. I wonder if there are any readers left?! If so... *waves* Hi. I've been spending my time lately alternating between university, working at Primark, and watching movies and tv shows off the internets. Nothing of particular moment has been happening in my life (how depressing) except that I turned 23 on the 24th of February. There was a surprise lunch for me with all my friends, and a surprise visit from two old and dear friends of mine, and many happy cakes, so all in all it was a lovely and surprising day :) I am however another year older and not (that I can see) particularly wiser, which distresses me somewhat. (If you see any traces of wisdom emerging do let me know).

That is all for now.

London Calling

So, as promised, here I am to write all about my London trip.

The first day pretty much adhered to Murphy's law.

As I may or may not have stated here before, I am pretty broke at the moment, and have a huge electricity bill to pay next week. I know, I know, it is suicide for broke people to visit London, but I had plenty to occupy me that did not involve spending (much) and so decided to take the plunge. I had my 'free' day of pampering (note the quote-unquote) and my book-signing, and my time with friends, and my cheap tickets, and so. Off I went, with a song in my heart and a swing in my step and random bits of rubbish in my wallet.

I started out by missing the coach.

I have never travelled at 8.00 am and therefore, thoroughly forgot to account for the morning rush. I left half an hour to get to the station, as it usually takes about ten minutes by cab. This time, it took ten minutes to get halfway down the main road. I missed the bus by about two minutes. My friend (Kanchi) was there on time, face anxiously glued to her watch. So obviously I paid for both of our tickets, it being my fault, and sadly waved goodbye to about 34 quid before we even started out.

Once there, we found our way to the studio without any trouble, and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves drinking juice and getting styled and made-up according to our request. Kanchi made some very good industry contacts (the stylist and photographer) and we dressed up in our favourite clothes and had pictures taken on a variety of different sets. To my complete and utter shock, I was not in the least bit camera shy, and when we got to see the pictures at the end of it, they were absolutely gorgeous. 

So where does Murphy's law come in?

FRIENDLY MANAGER: So, ladies! Do you like your pictures?

US: OMG YES YES A THOUSAND TIMES YES.

FRIENDLY MANAGER: Good! They start out at £70 each.

US: ...

FRIENDLY MANAGER: So these are our different, very expensive, deals. Would you like some time alone to discuss which you'd prefer?

US: PLEASE GO AWAY NOW.

For those of you unfamiliar with the pound and the student budget, let me put it this way...I would not shell out 70 quid for a winter coat, much less a photograph of myself. I could just imagine my housemate's reaction, considering how I'd hyperventilated when confronted with a 4-month electricity bill of £80 each. "OMG WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU, DON'T YOU HAVE A MIRROR IN YOUR ROOM?!?!"

Such sentences were going through my mind.

So when the very nice lady came back, we informed her that we could not afford anything very much, which meant, in a nutshell, anything. She was shocked and very sorry for us, because those pictures really were *sob* awesome. So she kept bringing the price down and offering us different, secret deals to suit our wallets. She did not succeed. Finally we ended up getting a few pictures between us, at a price that we will take to our graves (even though it was much much cheaper than the original). I got about four. That was all I could afford. When confronted by the Best Deal Possible, and the reproachful line "So what CAN you afford?" I finally cracked and said "OKAYFINE". Then I hyperventilated for the rest of the day, partly because of my financial condition and partly because of all the pictures I had to leave behind. 

Damn you, Murphy! Bright side: at least I got four gorgeous pictures, plus a few good ones of the both of us thrown in free.

The above narcissistic line is a testament to just how good the saleslady was. I mean, I'm a Visual Communications student and I have friends in the photography department. If I really wanted pictures of myself I could get them for free in our free studio that VisComm students get to use for free. Did I mention free?

Of course it took a long while trying to decide which pictures to take with us (Good God, what has happened to me?) The next event on the charts was my book signing, the main reason I had come to London in the first place. All I had in my hand was an address. Using the studio's computer, we discovered that it was very close to where we were. However, it required two buses, a long walk, and a certain amount of intuition to get there.

We took the first bus. It was packed. The driver had no mercy. I was almost cut in half by the door. I was lucky, and got away with merely being violently flung into the opposite wall. Kanchi was very nice and sympathetic and supportive.

I was finally forced to admit that I would never reach my destination in time. So I consumed a £1 burger of sorrow (it was delicious) and then set out to meet two of my good friends from back home,  Anisha and Prashant. I would be staying the night with Anisha, and had promised to cook them my special chicken. I hadn't seen them in ages, and was really looking forward to it, so of course my first reaction on seeing them again was "OMG GUYS I AM SO STUPID AAAAH YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE WHAT I JUST DID!!!! *passout*"

They were very comforting. I did not receive a lecture on the value of currency. I was calmed down and comforted without being sedated, which I had not thought possible. And then we all made dinner together, and Anisha's Spanish housemate told me how to make a Spanish omelette, which I intend to try out asap now that I'm back home. I sniffled and sneezed throughout, since - did I mention? - it had been raining the entire time, but I had an awesome time being with them again.

The next day, I had my eye out for Murphy, and was all ready to dodge him whenever he tried edging into the picture. I sneezed and sniffled my way to Earl's Court, where the awesome Kanchi was waiting for me, and then we spent the morning and afternoon at the Graduate Fashion Week courtesy of our good friend Aj who had a (very awesome) stand over there. I was absolutely thrilled to be there and get to see it, as he is my housemate and very good friend and I've been watching his project develop all year. We also got to see all sorts of brilliance by this year's UK Fashion Graduates, plus a real live fashion show which was all kinds of awesome. And we got a goody-bag with useful things in it, which is a rarity. And as many free Skinny Cow ice-creams as we wanted. There were many brilliant graphic design things for me to go "oooh" at, and as Kanchi's in the fashion industry, she made even more useful contacts, and all in all we had a great time.

Afterwards, we made our way to Saravana Bhavan.

Now, Kanchi and I are two lonely South Indians in a sea of North Indians. In the UK, naans and rotis and butter chicken are easily available, but dosais and vadais are few and far between. Saravana Bhavan is the most delectable of South Indian havens, and there is one branch of it in one corner of London. We decided to make the excursion, 1) because we are dosai-deprived and 2) because we were studiously avoiding Camden Market due to lack of funding, and figured this would be an inexpensive and productive way to spend our time. We were later joined by Aj, which meant we spent about two blissful hours there, consuming between us sambar vadais, medhu vadais, masala dosai, onion rava masala dosai (my staple) and...wait for it...TAMIL NADU FILTER COFFEE.

MUM *on phone*: Hi! It's been a while, what are you up to and how are you?

ME: Mum, I'm busy concentrating on my onion rava masala dosai, can I call you back?

Kanchi and I had to catch a coach at nine, and a tube strike was due to begin at seven. We evaded Murphy by getting to our station well before the time, and passing our time with Kanchi's friend in the free seating area at the food court. We were full after stuffing ourselves with dosais and the like, and so could wait until we were back in Birmingham to have dinner (at 12.30 am). I stayed over with Kanchi to avoid cab fare, and reached home the next afternoon. Since when I have been curled up under my duvet with books, movies and cold medicine, which is actually quite fun. Naturally, it is bright and sunny now that I'm spending my time indoors again.

So, all-in-all, it was a great trip. I got to spend quality time with my friends, especially Kanchi who will be leaving me soon *sob*, I have some great pictures and some greater memories, I got to look around at the GFW and its accompanying awesomeness, I ate authentic South Indian food which I had been CRAVING for, and Murphy's barbs were totally worth all that.

For those who don't know, Murphy's Law: Anything that can go wrong, will.

And for those interested (read: parents) I have since managed to sort out my financial troubles.

Also, tomorrow is my first day at work. Wish me luck, everyone :)

A 'quick' update, like I'm very busy at the moment.

So, many things, both interesting and entertaining, have occurred since the last time I posted (considering how long ago that was, it would be tragic if nothing had happened). Many times I thought 'Wow, this would make for a hilarious blog post!' and then never posted. A proper detailed post made now would run to several pages. This calls for bullet points! 

So, since my last post I have:

- Had to flee from an ancient and half-crazy gentleman with a lopsided turban who tried to kiss me while I was innocently skipping churchwards down the road.

- Been granted a big bookshelf by a benevolent landlord, and promptly purchased six awesome books for 1p each (!!!)

- Been invited to a book-signing in London (which is tomorrow), after adding one of my favourite authors and bloggers on Facebook.

- Won a makeover (complete with manicure, pedicure and facial) plus photoshoot at a studio in London (also tomorrow!) for me and a friend. Which means happytime with Kanchana - we get to spend some girlie time before she leaves and I am :(

- Found out that a good friend of mine from back home in Madras (Kirtanaaaa!) will be here in September to do her MBA in Aston. Proceeded to bounce around the house for 1 hour.

- Helped a friend get ready for the Graduate Fashion Week in London. Have been granted passes to visit said show on Tuesday. Wooo!

- Seen Star Trek. Jaw dropped in wonder. Resolved to see it again in IMAX. 180 degrees of Spock. Joy.

- Compiled a list of chick-flicks that EVERYONE has seen except me (eg. Notting Hill). Resolved to watch said flicks but not yet managed to begin. Have, however, watched Terminator Salvation, American Gangster, Ricochet, the Bourne trilogy, the Star Wars prequel trilogy, and other similar stuff.

- Handed in a final submission (branded myself using 'Artitude'). Did well but not as much as I'd have liked. Have managed, for the first time in my life, to Set Goals. Lets see how that works out for me now. I have pledged to teach myself web design, and design a website for my portfolio and freelance work from scratch, by the time uni opens again.

- Investigated Creative Writing competitions online. Did you know, ladies and gentlemen, that you can Win Money? I have resolved to try my hand at it, but am doubtful about whether I will succeed in Meeting Deadlines.

- GOT A JOB. As a Retail Operative at Primark. Will be operating tills and such henceforth. Nice people, nice workplace, free coffee, tea and milk. SCORE.

That is all. Well, that is all that comes to mind at the moment.

I hereby solemnly swear to write about my London trip, which promises to be both exciting and eventful.

Til next time then. 

Mum and Dad's Excellent Adventure

Before I commence, I should mention that this is a long overdue post. The events related here occurred about a month ago, but there were submissions and other random occurrences that prevented me from writing, and afterwards whenever I had the time, I worried that I was not sufficiently 'inspired' at that moment to do the topic justice. Honestly, I feel that way now as well, but I've realised that if I sit around waiting for the 'muse' as it were, this will probably never get written. And I cannot deny this story to people who have the privilege and pleasure of knowing my parents.

I have to admit that at the time these events occurred, I was not in the same city, or even in the same country, so my perspective is that of the third person. Nevertheless, perhaps this makes it all the more entertaining, as the story was related to me by my mother, who has a very unique outlook on life. I loved her point of view so much that a large part of the story will be related through iChat transcripts (I saved the conversation the second it ended).

So now to the point. The setting: the day before my submissions, me scrambling last minute as per usual, alternately Googling images and pulling my hair out. Suddenly, Mum pops online on iChat.

MUM: *brightly* Hi! Are you there? Watcha doing?

ME: Sort of. Working. *hint hint*

MUM: I had an 'interesting' day...

ME: *imagines some vague relative re-emerging from the mists of Time to come over for tea* Oh, really?

MUM: ...we chased a thief and caught him and got back Daddy's cellphone that he had stolen!

ME: ...WHAT?

MUM: Read again.

So now, we pause for a little more backstory. A couple of months before my departure, much to my displeasure, Mum had hired a live-in houseboy. No more wandering around the house in 'comfortable' clothes for me, but to be fair she really needed the help, and my grandparents needed some form of Hindi-speaking servant around. I would have found him much easier to tolerate if it wasn't for his habit of 'affectionately' squeezing the life out of my dog after bellowing 'Saaaaaam' in the tones of a wounded bear. Ugh. But anyway. Once I moved to the UK, I developed the habit of saying 'beat him' whenever the houseboy was mentioned, even though I didn't really mean it and Mum obviously would never do such a thing. Eventually, the aforementioned went on leave indefinitely, and Mum had to hire another houseboy. This one was unreliable, smoked and had a cellphone that rang a lot, making him even worse than the previous one. I urged Mum to sack him, but she felt bad about 'sending him out into the cold' for some reason (even though it's not in the least bit cold in Chennai, ever).

Now back to the story.

ME: Was it the houseboy? Beat him!

MUM: I sacked the houseboy yesterday. He didn't have a chance to take anything as we watched him leave, but he did not take his things.

ME: You finally sacked him? Why?

MUM: His work was bad and he smokes and is shifty. Anyway...

...so basically what happened is, the boy didn't return, but sent the fellow who brought him (Manoj) to collect his pay and his things. This character was standing around near the kitchen door (by the cupboard where Dad charges his phone) while Mum ran up and down getting the pay together. The next morning, Daddy couldn't find his phone, and when they tried calling it, they got the 'switched off' message. Uh-oh.

MUM: So we thought and thought and reconstructed everything and concluded this Manoj had taken it.

ME: ...and?

MUM: I told Daddy I would not let him get away with it but try and catch him!

ME: Wow. And then and then?

MUM: I called the boss Chakravarty and he said he'd already sacked Manoj, but offered to get us another servant. I said heck with the servant, I want our phone!

ME: *highly impressed*

MUM: So we hatched a plot to snare the guy without him suspecting anything, and went to the office but he didn't show up. So the boss and his brother got into our car and we hared off to Alwarpet and finally caught him there...

ME: Oh, boy.

MUM: We put him in the car, with Chakravarty and his brother on either side and Daddy and I in front, and said give it back or we'll take you to the police station.

ME: Haha!

MUM: Daddy looked stern and drove, and I did the talking.

ME: You sound like Mafia!

MUM: I told him, look, we're really not interested in having you beaten up by the police. So just give us the phone and we'll let you go. Anyway, he denied it most unconvincingly, so Daddy starting heading to the police station, and then he suddenly said he had it at the place where he was staying.

ME: *speechless*

MUM: Are you there? Do you want to hear the rest?

ME: ...yes please. I await it eagerly.

MUM: So then we hared off to St. Mary's road and reached a fancy house like a fortress where his sister and aunt work as servants. Chakravarty had asked the lady of the house to hold his bags and not let him take them. So we stopped and Chakravarty's brother went in to search his bags, but the phone wasn't there. He brought the bags out, and then...

ME: ...and then???

MUM: And then the chap takes the phone out of his underwear where he had hidden it! It was in the car with him all the time!

ME: ...I hope Daddy's not using that phone.

MUM: Well, he had wrapped it carefully in plastic, so it should be clean...I hope.

ME: Tell him to trade it in for the C905.

MUM: You tell him. Anyway, while we had been driving, I turned around and gave the boy a lecture and advised him to change his ways and turn over a new leaf. Told him he'd land in jail or worse if he continued like this, and other people might not be so charitable. He said "I want to go back to Calcutta!" I said, "Well, go to Calcutta, but be good and do an honest day's work and you'll be okay."

ME: *disbelief* Wow, I'm not around so you're adopting random thieves.

MUM: Well, he looked small and miserable!

ME: ...

MUM: Anyway, after that he had the gall to say "I don't have money to go to Calcutta, give me some money" even though Chakravarty had sacked him for swindling them out of 50,000 rupees...

ME: Please tell me you didn't give him money. I bet he's a drug dealer. Beat him.

MUM: Anyway, we left him walking across the road with his bags. That's the first time in my life I've chased a thief and caught him!

ME: ...so now we don't have a houseboy? :)

Anyway, it turns out we may get Wounded Bear (aka Robby) back after all, but everyone's feeling a lot fonder of him after the above experience, because although he had no manners, he also had no loudly ringing cellphones or cellphone-thieving friends. So, it's all good. And I am highly amused by my Mum's thief-reforming tendencies. All this interesting stuff seems to happen when I'm not there!

ME: See, it's all that houseboy's fault! Beat him!

MUM: You come and beat him.

Well, neither of us are going to, obviously, but I hope someone does.

Procrastination - A Case Study

So here I am, almost 22 years old, the first semester of my second BA concluded. And I am thinking, what am I doing here, hanging about doing yet another college degree when I should be TEACHING by now, having attained the highest qualification possible in my area of expertise...PROCRASTINATION.

ARGH.

What IS it that makes people like me procrastinate? Are we lazy? Let me think about that one. As eyewitnesses can attest, I have almost limitless supplies of energy - when it comes to any activity that does not have any kind of immediate usefulness. Of course, I do my fair share of lying around, but no more than any other human being my age and much less than some. It's very easy to get me interested in something, there are very few things I actively dislike, I generally go along easily with any plan, I don't mind walking for long periods of time, if someone has a project due and needs my help, I generally agree instantly if I think I can do a good job of it, and don't mind working hard for it either. But when it comes to my OWN work...ah. That is an entirely different ball game altogether. The kind of ball game where I sit down on the sidelines and watch with interest, even if no one but myself is on the field.

Like...take now for example. I have an interesting and not overly complicated project due at the start of the second semester. I've had the whole of our 20-day Christmas break, plus a few weeks before it, to work on it, think about it, redo it fifty times if I so desire, cast it in bronze AFTER learning how to do so, etc. And yet here I am, two days before submission, sitting on my ass (should I say 'arse' now that I reside in England?) with a hazy idea of what I WOULD have done if I had the time now. And instead of panicking and starting, I look for ways to procrastinate further and thus sit and type out a long and a overdue blog post on procrastination.

Classic.

Now comes the complicated part. I WANT to work. I WANT to excel. I WANT to be the best, because I know that I am good and thus far have been clinging to mediocrity because of my weakness, my addiction, my drug - procrastination. If I was just lazy, a few good slaps and possibly a prod or two with a burning brand (I could manage these things with the aid of my most excellent and wonderful friends/housemates) would be able to snap me out of it. But it is hard, oh so hard, to break a procrastinator of his/her habit. Especially when that habit has been ingrained almost since birth. I don't even know why I do it! I love to write, but when presented with a deadline, I will put it off like it is some undesirable deed which I am being forced to do by evil and sadistic people seeking only my discomfort. I love to read, but during my Literature BA, I read almost none of my prescribed books (this did not stop me from ranking then, fortunately) because...it seemed too much like work. I read about a billion other books during those three years though, and carefully saved up my 'textbooks' to read after my course was over (still procrastinating on that one by the way, it's been over a year).

But what really burns me up is the frustration of latent talent unused. I can write, and I can write well, and I have possessed diaries and blogs for more than ten years...but I kept allowing them to fizzle out and die. I could have accumulated years of writing practice and been really good by now, I could have been publishing books by now for heaven's sake, if I had the focus and set some kind of goal for myself instead of leaving it as a vague idea, an item in the list of 'things I must someday do if I ever manage to motivate myself'. I write poetry, and I'm not bad, but I write an average of one or two poems per year, because I never make myself actually sit down and write one. I used to draw a lot as a child, and I am artistic, but I've hardly developed that talent at all...I could have been really, really good by now, and as it is, I am again stuck in the 'average' category on the list of 'people who can draw'. If I ever actually sit down and think about all this, I get so frustrated with myself...which is why I probably procrastinate on doing it.

I think my problem might be that I am afraid to think too hard about things that are important, and so I don't. I avoid them like the escapist I am, and try to worry about things as they come. But maybe they wouldn't come if I worried about them a little earlier. I don't even know if there is a specific cause for procrastination, and whether I can find it, but I certainly would like to know if there is a cure...though I suppose it would involve willpower.

I am quite annoyed right now. I don't want to be like this, and I don't even know why I'm STILL sitting her blithering about it instead of doing what I'm supposed to be doing. Ugh. Cheeta, you disgust me. *slap*

Anyway, enough bitching about the self :-) Off I go now, on a mission to do the right thing! But first, a bath is in order. And - if you have any anti-procrastination tips for me, spill them! I beg of you.

Still alive, still here, still jobless.

Sadly, my dreams of how to spend the Christmas holidays have come to nothing (this would be the dream of hysterically working my ass off and thus accumulating large sums of money) which means that I am now spending Christmas in London with my good friends Anisha and Prashant, at the house of Aunty Hazel, a lovely British lady with whom we shall have a lovely English Christmas. I also get to attend a lovely Christmas service with people from my church, which is more than I had hoped for from this year really.

...remind me why I started off my paragraph with the word 'sadly'?

The only sad part (aside from the mercenary) is that I'll be missing Christmas with my housemates...the pain is dulled somewhat by the fact that we have cleverly devised a way in which I can still participate in Secret Santa, long distance. Exchanging of the chits has just occurred, which means that I'm already worrying about whether my Secret Victim will like my present or not. 

I am aware that 'tis the season to be jolly, and sing 'fa-la-la-la-la' in an annoying high pitched voice in people's ears at unexpected moments, but somehow this year I feel most un-Christmassy. All this is despite the fact that the city centre has been drenched with Christmas lights and decorations since the beginning of November, and giant Christmas trees have been erected at strategic points, and all the shops have cunningly lowered their prices in time for Christmas shopping (who's complaining?!) It didn't take much thought to conclude that this sad lack of Christmas spirit is not due so much to the lack of Christmas-ness in the environment, but to the lack of home, family and my lovely, lovely church, St. Andrew's Kirk Chennai. Sigh.

Usually, things go somewhat like this:

UNIVERSE: Psst, Cheeta...I think Christmas is coming on soon.

ME: WOO HOO, BRING ON THE BUBBLY!

This year goes somewhat like this...

UNIVERSE: CHRISTMAS IS COMING! CHRISTMAS IS COMING! I WILL NOW PROCEED TO OVERLOAD YOUR BRAIN WITH CHRISTMAS VIBES FOR 2 MONTHS STRAIGHT!

ME: Hmm, what? Can you repeat that please, I think I missed it.

Sigh.

The thing is that I generally spend the whole of December with my parents and my church buddies, attending an endless stream of plays, dinners, concerts and parties, including iconic and anticipated events like the Christmas Pantomime by the Little Theatre, the outdoor carol concert at the MCC grounds for two evenings straight, Carols by Candlelight, Nine Lessons and Carols in church, and the famous carol rounds - to name a few. To crown it all, I do my best to attend both the midnight and the morning services on both Christmas and New Year, just so I make sure I see and wish everyone possible. I put a lot of thought into my clothes every year, and make sure I wear something interesting that is NOT a sari (because everyone else wears one). And most of all, the people I spend Christmas with keep the true meaning and significance of Christmas in sight, whereas here it seems to be almost solely about Santa and reindeers and trees and presents, which is all very well and good and fun, but not actually what Christmas is. They should be the subtext, not the meaning, but here the roles seem to have been reversed. 

I just can't wait to see a familiar face from St. Andrew's...Anisha, here I come! And when I get back, I need to find a good church hopefully somewhat similar to mine at home, and make some friends there to talk about Christian things with, or I'm totally going to lose my thread and float away into the darkness. Except less dramatically. I miss my church and the people in it so much. I haven't missed a single Sunday for years, but since I came here, I haven't had the heart to search very hard for a new church...I think because I'm so attached to my own, where I've been all my life, my comfort zone, where I know everyone and everyone knows me, and I have my own little family of dogs in the grounds.It was not just my place of worship, in a way it was my family, and the people in it helped me to stay grounded, and I never really realised it because I'm so independent, but now that they're not so easily within reach anymore...I'm on my own and losing ground. Sigh. I haven't suffered from homesickness, but I hope I can spend my next Christmas back home. Meanwhile, I need to pick my spirits (especially my Christmas spirit) up, dust them off, give them a strong dose of brandy or some similar beverage, get my backside off this chair and go shopping for presents and a Christmas outfit - it's the 21st and I have just the vaguest idea of what to wear. And this year, I'm going to blend with the crowd, and not more than 3 people are going to know my name. But then again, that's not what important or what Christmas is all about, is it? :-)

Joy to the world.

Jobless...literally!

So, I procrastinated a little where my NI number was concerned, and then when I finally got it, a CV had to be prepared, etc etc etc, you get the picture, and now people tell me that applications for all the easy-to-get Christmas jobs are closed. Oops. So since then, I've been victim to a belated fit of productivity, having belatedly realised that it would be quicker to surf around on the web a little and then think hard for one hour rather than sit around waiting for people to help me. I finally set up and installed my printer, printed out a stack of CVs and spent half a day wandering around the city centre, walking into stores and asking if they had any vacancies. Many places were full already, but a few took my CV and said they'd get back to me when they had vacancies in Jan (sob! Must...have...Christmas...job!) and Borders actually told me it'd be smarter to apply at the end of December when people were leaving and they would need replacements. Primark of course has probably recieved 6 billion applications from uni students seeking holiday income, so I'm really not counting on that.

A couple of places seemed promising. I printed out the application forms for Next and Oasis and filled them in...Next seems like a bit of a lucky draw really, because you just dump the forms into a huge postbox-like thing and I really wonder if they read them all (sure hope they do though!) but Oasis not only told me that they had a vacancy, but were very nice to me as well, and checked what times I'd be available, etc. I would be so, so happy if I got a chance to work there, the work ethic and the other employees are great, and it's a smaller store so I'd be able to gain some experience in a less stressful manner than if I was working for a huge place like, say, Primark (though I'll take what I get at this point, I'm really not going to be too picky).

Working here is very different from back home in Chennai...you actually have half a chance of landing a decent part-time job as a student, for example, and you get paid pretty well...enough to live on. I cannot imagine this ever happening in Chennai, or indeed anywhere in India...for one there are way more people than jobs, for another, everyone's looking at how many degrees you have and how fancy they are, and whether you have a US or UK degree (well, now I will...ha ha). With all this, and the craze for hiring 'experienced' people, it's a miracle I actually bumped into my previous boss and benefactor (in the form of my singing teacher) who hired me for a good job because she wanted to help out a fresher and help them grow and develop (who does that anymore?) 

Over here, it's different...no one has any issues with hiring someone right out of school, and indeed if you are overqualified a schoolkid could easily edge you out, because apparently no one likes overqualified people. To my great surprise, I for once am overqualified for something, and so have had to water down my CV a great deal and occasionally knock out my first BA. And of course, where previous jobs are concerned, I definitely cannot put down my last job title (which was admittedly much fancier than my job, and which I did not live up to in any sense of the word) because 'Business Development Executive and Creative Consultant' sounds like I'm 35, professional and more suited to an office environment than bagging clothes and giving people change (which is what I desperately want to do at this point).

Anyway, the weekend has been spent walking around the city centre all by my lonesome, seeking jobs, dropping off application forms and in the case of today, hunting for boots. Very enjoyable it has all been. And I am now plus a few shreds of hope and a full set of thermals, purchased today post form-dropping, so I'm fairly pleased. Tomorrow, Marks&Spencers phone application! Sigh. Wherever I start working, I would love to end up working for Marks&Spencer. Would be even more awesome to start there, but well, one can't have everything.

Wish me luck though! Prayers, positive vibes and good wishes much appreciated. Toodles.

Another week, another post.

So, it's been just another week. Yawn. Actually, it's been less eventful than most weeks, considering I attended less class than usual (ahem...this was not entirely my fault) and nothing very eventful happened except...

I. GOT. MY. LAPTOP.

Oh my GAWD. I have been waiting for this, and making attemps to buy this, for two months now. TWO MONTHS. And now I HAVE IT. Happy does not even begin to express it. I was afraid to get too excited until the purchase had actually been made...this was not helped by the card reader acting up at the store...and once I actually had it in my hands, I sat down on a bench, held it in my arms, and spaced out for about five minutes, going 'mmmm' and staring into the distance with what was probably a very vacant expression. Then I called my parents in India, woke them up in the middle of the night, and squeaked away in a voice that was probably several octaves above normal. 

:D

Heeheeheehee I have a laptop...eeeeeeee. Okay I will grow up now. But. Eeeek. It's so beautiful. And shiny. And I like it ever so much more than the old Macbook Pro, though I do wish they'd kept it either entirely silver or entirely black. AND I got a free printer, or well, rather a printer I'm going to get reimbursed for. The only drawback was that the free iPod nano offer ended just a couple days before I managed to buy it. I was supposed to give it to my friend, who's been listening to me whine about my lack of laptop and letting me make endless calls to Apple on his phone and endless email checks on his laptop for two months. So much patience. I think he should at least have got the nano after all the trouble he took for me...I even had to transfer the money to his account and buy it with his card. It's still sinking in...I...actually...managed...to...acquire...my...Macbook...Pro. Mmmm. :) This post is going to be slightly incoherent, put it down to internal excitement.

What made it even better was the fact that we went out for dinner to celebrate and I had Chinese/Japanese food for the first time since coming to the UK :) Sure, I ended up spending quite a lot, but it was so worth it. It concluded with coconut ice cream with mango sauce...MMM.

I'm saying 'mmm' quite a lot today. Hmmm. 

My friend's been working this weekend, so I've spent most of yesterday and today chilling out at home, except for some bowling last night, where I unexpectedly managed at least 4 strikes :D Today was music downloading day. I cannot believe how fast I can download stuff here. WiFi here is faster than broadband in India. I've downloaded more than 50-100 songs today. Unfortunately, I don't remember everything I used to listen to before I moved here, but I've done my best to get some of it back. And rediscovered a couple of bands I adore for good reason...most notably Casting Crowns. Best gospel rock band ever. Beautiful lyrics, and they sound just like 3 Doors Down, which I love too :D The only drawback is, I've been sitting in front of the laptop for most of the day, which means that my back is frozen into position and will take a while to thaw out. Ow. 

My next post will definitely be more interesting. My laptop joy is kind of blocking everything else from my mind right now. Til next time then.

Hey-oh!

I saw SNOW! Well, it's not like I haven't seen it before, but usually whenever I got there, it was already lying about on the ground, like when I visited the French alps when I was 13. Much fun was had with snow angels, sledding, falling through snow into hidden streams et al, but I never actually saw it fall out of the sky, which is what I experienced a couple of days ago.

It was utterly random...I had been expecting snowfall in Dec-Jan, for Christmas perhaps...not on Diwali! Oddly enough, my classmates and I were sitting around discussing snow, and suddenly one of them mentioned that it had been forecasted for the next day, making me jump out of my skin...and then we peeped out of the window and saw sleet, which became proper snowfall on the way home. By the time we got out of the bus, the tops of the trees, hedges and walls, not to mention the roofs of the houses, all looked like they'd been coated with sugar icing, and big flakes of snow were drifting prettily through the air like salt from the world's biggest shaker. Ooooh. I have to confess, I went totally nuts, and skipped down the middle of the street in my very inappropriate high heeled shoes and 'this-girl-was-totally-not-expecting-snow-today' outfit. I was a little busy jumping up and down trying to catch snow on my tongue, and so ignored my friend's stern injunctions to put up my hood. This, I found, was unwise. (Though fun.) I spent half the night with a fever of about 102, shivering and shaking no matter how warm it got, and effectively cancelling out our Diwali plans, which I still feel guilty about.

Before I was put out of action, though, we dressed up nice and warm, took a bus to the city centre, and wandered around aimlessly, all nice and full of post-snow excitement. I think we were hoping it would snow again, and enough to make snowballs this time, but no such luck...and we had to take refuge in the mall before we froze to death. This resulted in some very vague window shopping and a couple of pranks that really annoyed me (spoilsport that I am) and getting sicker with each passing second really did not help. By the time we finally left, my skin was still nice and warm but my bones felt like ice, and I have to confess I was really, really glad to get back home and hide under a duvet shivering...but seeing snowfall for the first time was totally worth it all. (Though I still wish I hadn't spoilt Diwali for anyone else. Have I mentioned what awesome friends I have here?)

I have no idea what sort of stupid fever that was, because it tortured me for 24 hours with dizziness and body ache and then abruptly disappeared into the dim and distant past. Let me illustrate how abruptly...in the morning, I was falling over when I tried to get out of bed, and in the evening I was trotting off to see Quantum of Solace with my friends like nothing ever happened. Yay. The cold is really killing, though...the weather was absolutely fine before it suddenly plunged to a couple of degrees below zero and stuck there. Memo: Must buy a cap before my ears fall off. Not to mention gloves. I DID get the coat I mentioned I was going a-hunting for, AND I got it for half price :) I love it...it's light grey with big black buttons. Even better, it reaches just to the top of my thighs, therefore my daddy declares it cannot be warm enough and has instructed me to buy another one. I have been TOLD to buy a second coat, even though I already have one. This makes me very happy *grin* Usually, I am being TOLD not to do things like that.

Anyway, enough about the weather. The weather is known to be a very popular topic among those who have searched and searched but yet found no other topic suitable for discussion, and here I am chatting away merrily about it like it's the only thing on Earth that fascinates me (it's not.)

I was lying about at home today, attempting to watch Corpse Bride online - it took quite a few attempts, but I managed it in the end - when I recieved a mail update from our university's Christian Union. So far, I've been too chicken to go to any of the events, even though I'm pretty starved for Christian company right now...because I am a total coward when it comes to walking in randomly someplace where I don't know a soul. Of course I do have friends who'd come with me if I asked them, but so help me, I'm a little chicken about that as well. Anyway, today's update advertised a fireworks display/bonfire/barbeque happening tonight, which sounded really fun and cost only £5 a head, and I suddenly really wanted to go but was chickening out as usual. And then one of my friends online noticed something was off and asked me what was wrong and I said nah, there's just this thing and I was wondering whether to go and he said oh great, if you go let me know as well. And then I texted my other friend mentioning it and, well, I don't really have any secrets from him and he figured I'd want to go, so he was like, okay, let's leave as soon as I get home. So it looks like I might actually go after all, to this scary scary place where I do not know a soul :) although of course I will be taking known souls along with me, or rather they will be taking me. Yay. Hope it works out.

So, when I said 'occasional' I meant...

First off, I should probably clarify that my 'occasional updates on life' weren't actually intended to be this 'occasional' (ie - once in 2 months or so). I was intending to post once a week at least, but due to various and sundry complications, the most major one being my lack of a laptop - STILL - I have relegated my internet time to more important activities, like email and Facebook. Anyway, I doubt anybody's stumbled across this yet, so I needn't bother apologising :D

First, on the laptop issue. I have made a discovery, viz. that Apple hates me. To cut a long story short, I was trying to buy a Macbook Pro with a credit card I didn't have with me (though I did have the number), which meant I could only order it on the phone or on the internet rather than simply going to the store and picking it up. After many failed attempts and the unceremonious slaughter of much false hope, I discovered that unless your billing address is a UK one, they will not process your order. This, after many salespeople had promised me their superior bypassing skills, and after Apple had actually deducted more than a lakh from my mum's bank account (I hope they put it back). I have finally decided that patience is a virtue and that my best bet is to wait for my educational loan to (finally) be 100% processed and the money to be transferred, so I can take myself down to the store and purchase my laptop with a fat bundle of cash. I know that this day will come...eventually...and that I WILL possess the laptop...eventually...so for now, I am being patient. (Pffft, because I have no choice.) Until then, I have a very generous friend whose laptop I am using all the time, not to mention hundreds of university Mac Pros at my disposal. Not that this means that I had sufficient time to make blog posts or anything.

In other news, I have now been in the Yoo-kay for almost 2 months and it has been a vairy interesting and instructive experience. Much fun being had, much food being eaten, good friends on all sides, superior public transport, cheap dessert and drinks, nice cold weather and shoes on sale all the freaking time, ahahahaa :D Not to mention that I love my university and my course, which is probably the most interesting one I have ever taken. Some really good professors as well. And for homeworking, assignmentdoing and general thinkifying, we have something called a Reflective Visual Journal (oooh, fancy) also known as an RVJ, which is basically sort of a big, A3-sized, glorified scrapbook, which is going to look so awesome once we're through with the module...although that is not the essential point of it, it's so the profs can look at it after we submit our final project and follow our thought process, our journey, our whatever. Awesome, I do think. I'm quite looking forward to following my thought processes as well, they generally manage to escape me entirely and I only come across them in random scraps of poetry or writing much much later...if I have any. This'll be my first visual journal. I haven't been very diligent at keeping journals in the past - though I started them with much enthusiasm - but since this one is pretty much one big piece of homework, its future looks bright. I am reminded that I was never very diligent at doing homework either, but these things can be overcome. I hope.

Speaking of overcoming things, I wonder if I will ever be able to stop the shopaholicking. Fortunately for me, over here I actually had to do a great deal of shopping since there were many essential items of clothing I required...come on, this is the coldest place I have ever lived in, it's 10 degrees outside right now. The number one item on my 'urgent' list right now is a proper overcoat. I went out in search of one yesterday, and found many similar items like fluffy, furry jackets, suede jackets with fur lining, smart short coats et al, ALL of which I wanted to buy, none of which I did. So to console myself, I bought gloves + matching scarf (which I needed) and a pair of shoes (which I did not need, but which I had coveted for ages) and rescheduled coat shopping to Monday. I will be in the company of a good friend who is older and wiser than I and who can be counted on to have my best interests at heart, so I'm reasonably sure I will come back with something functional and elegant *fingers crossed*

My friends over here seriously deserve mention. I love my friends. They're like my family, and thanks to them, I have never had a chance to feel lonely or homesick since the second I landed here...literally. I've never had so little 'alone time' in my life, and I've never missed it less. It's been fun, fun, fun, and I've learned to do many things, like cook, and use a washing machine, and grocery shop, and dance (okay, have to admit, not yet learnt that properly) and yes, many other things. The only times I've felt homesick are when I miss my church, for which I have not yet found an acceptable substitute, and then everyone has had to look on helplessly while I wail 'Oh my Gooood, I miss my chuuuurch' and shed buckets of tears. This has only happened twice though...okay, maybe thrice.

In other news, my Dad has just added me on Facebook, and I have no idea how to handle this situation -_- I had warned my parents that if they ever show up there, I'm not going to be adding them, but now that the time has come, I feel a bit bad about it, in an 'awww, poor Daddy' way. But on the other hand, Facebook is a page for your friends, not your parents, and although I don't really have anything to hide from my parents (now there's a shocker), I don't necessarily want them having access to me from the same angle as my friends do. Hmm. I think Daddy can stick to talking to me on the phone. I guess I can expect a friend request from Mum tomorrow as well. Sheesh. Whatever happened to FB being a college networking place?

Oh well, this calls for a good lunch. And some cheesecake, mmm. 'Til the next 'occasion' then.

Renovation!

So, now that I'm going off abroad and all, I decided to blog - which is the easier option. The other option is sending out at least 5-6 emails a day all containing the same news. Yawn. I don't think so. If you recieve emails from me, you are:

a) A privileged person receiving information other people are not.
b) I don't want to give you my blog URL. Which means you will not be reading this. Okbye.

Yes. So I remembered I had a perfectly good blog with a URL I rather fancied (candied charcoal. Awww). So rather than having to sit and think up another name I fancy just as much (which would take a long time, and by then, knowing me, I'd have lost interest) I just logged on, deleted all my 2 year old, teenage-angst-ridden posts - this used to be my private sekrit anonymous blog - and decided to commence renovations.

Since I am going off to a brand-new (to me) country and all, I'm sure I will have many many interesting and instructive things to blog about (well, i&i to me. The rest of you will just have to trawl through my posts to find out things you want to know).

I'm off to pack. Later :-)

I love the smell of rain.

It's been hot, humid, close and muggy for a few days, and now suddenly the wind's blowing like crazy, the sky's grey, and the trees are dancing all over the place. I love this. It's like a brief reward after doing something hard.

I love rain. I love cloudy, grey weather. It makes me come alive like sunshine never does.

***

I stand alone in the storm
Suddenly sweet words take hold
Hurry, they say, for you haven't much time
Open your eyes to the love around you
You may feel you're alone
But I'm here still with you
You can do what you dream
Just remember to listen to the rain...

***

...yep, definitely a 'rain' person. Soft, gentle rain, loud thunder and lightning, crazy wind or a damp, cool breeze...it just does something for me. Though if I get wet, I'd rather a torrential downpour...I want to be entirely wet or entirely dry, not something in between :D Though microscopic misty drops that blow all over the place are fun too.

Okay, I'm going on a bit. *ends*

I have time on my hands.

I remember last summer, when I nearly went crazy. When you move to the edge of the city and can't pop out at a moment's notice, when you don't have the sort of friends you can hang out with on anything like a regular basis and when your family doesn't whizz you off somewhere for the summer holidays, I guess that qualifies as the expected outcome.

When I was a kid, I used to lock myself in my room so the other kids couldn't drag me out to play. And I have been dragged. Forcibly. I could read for a day at a stretch, and I could think for longer. I simply didn't need anyone else when I was at home. Just how healthy that attitude is for a kid who has to attend school, I can tell you. Not at all. Was I normal, socially? Well, take a wild guess.

Now, double the years have passed and since I got busier, I've found that I can't read for too long without having to get up and do something in between. I can't think for too long, because I drive myself crazy. Though I have less control over that than one would imagine...sometimes I just don't think about something at all and whizz merrily along, and then when the occasion to speak about said thing arises, I find I have a whole lot of thoughts and opinions waiting to spill over. Subconscious thought - good or bad?

In some cases, rather terrible. A lot of my situations arise from thinking too much.

This blog wasn't created to angst, really, so I'm keeping this down to mere observation.

This summer, fortunately, things are different. I'm popping off to Kodaikanal with my family for about 10-12 days - and I love that place like nobody's business. Then we zip off to this Youth Camp organised by Navodaya, and this rocks because there'll be around 500 people there who qualify as 'Youth' and I desperately want to meet and get to know more people. If I'd known I would some years back, I'd have been absolutely amazed, but there it is. People change. Thank goodness.

I have about a week before I leave and a week after I come back to blow before - joy!! Third year begins. That's about the right amount of time to read, potter about, try and get back into my abstract art, generally waste space, get on with Youth stuff and hang out with the two friends I do hang out with outside college, who are both from church.

So, as I said, this summer things are different. :-)

Also, study holidays = holidays with something to occupy you (ie - exams) in between. So now, I can potter about for a couple of days at a time, relearning the joys Wodehouse has to offer and finding that I can, when the occasion merits it, still read for hours at a stretch.

I did say that I ramble.

Egad! I did it.

I'm one of those loonies who creates a blog everywhere and then neglects most of them, but I did think I'd leave Blogger unscathed.

Oh, well, bad things happen to everybody.

Now if only this thing would acknowledge my blog as existing, I could at least look at my handiwork and assess the damage.

One great thing about this place is that I can babble anonymously. For a period of time, at least. Before I start slinging out this URL like candy. And yes, that ridiculous metaphor is rather apt, as I'm one of those people who actually does chuck candy around the class on a regular basis.

Weird? Who, me?